I wish for a chance...

My current addiction…

2009-05-08T14:09:00.001+08:00

I’m currently addicted to Channel V’s 模范棒棒堂..

All I can say is that although they may seem very SET (taiwan language), but they are really funny… Super funny…

They consist of 六棒 and 模范七棒…

Introducing my LOVES <3

From 六棒 - 小煜 n 敖犬

And from 模范七棒 - 鮪魚 n 李銓

LOVES LOVES LOVES <3

My truly first CLUBBING experience...

2009-04-30T17:16:00.004+08:00

~White lie?? Nope it's not considered to be one.. It's a lie...~

Went Zouk with Mel and Teddy...
Teddy was rather busy signing his card most of the time... hahahaha...

Mel and I went earlier to queue for the free entry... and Teddy uses his Citibank Cardholder privileges to get a free entry too.. hahaha..

I seriously duno how to spell all the names of the stuffs I drank... I dun even know the names properly... hahahaha

Had:
Giga Bomb @ Winebar
Gas Chamber @ Zouk
Flaming Flamingo @ Zouk
Orange Vodka @ Zouk

All paid by Teddy... Thanks wife... hahaha =)

Dragged him over to accompany us as we seem rather pathetic alone... hahah...
He drove to Zouk in half an hour..

But we left in a cab cuz he's with his other frenz.. =)

Photos:

Mr Teddy.

Miss Melissa

Miss REINA...

Us getting abit nutz...

Mel and me... YEAHNESS...

Me and my wife, TEDDY..

KISSES~

Teddy and his weird weird actions and faces... hahaha

Mel, JANICA and me...

We met her outside ZOUK... hahaha

Me and Denise... HALL 3~~~

Enjoyed myself...

But was rather disappointed though...

never mind....

PS: I din see any cute guy... hahahaha... Mayb even I did, I was abit dizzy due to the low lighting... hahaha.

Tear of remorse and guilt

2009-04-27T00:52:00.002+08:00

I finally dropped my first tear with relations to my long-over exams...

During and before my exams, I had never felt a sense of urgency to study or any urge to even revise...

But finally today, at this point of time, I thought back and I dropped my first tear of remorse and guilt... I finally felt the stress of exams... But I guess it is really too late... What is over is over... Nothing can be done to turn back time or to freeze time so that the date of release of results will never arrive...

Am I being too heck-care due to my lack of interest for engineering or isit some other reason??
My heart cannot even think of any realistic reasons for my attitude...

Who am I trying to show my heck-care-ness?
Why am I doing so??
Are you even noticing me once again???

I officially moved out of HALL... A place where contains lotsa of fun and tears... Reason being that having to stay in a small room all alone (due to the lack of my roommate's presence), I tend to think more and tear whenever I thought about him in the past... And that there is totally nothing much to do, other than fiddling with the laptop... It's totally boring~~ but ironically, there are so many laughters and fun that I'm feeling a sense of relunctance to leave that small room... I may have dropped much tears in there, but I know that the laughters will overcover all that tears...

I can lead my own life now and I am happy like this now...
I miss my hall pals... and I miss the feeling of having a room to yourself to think through many stuffs in life...

I realised...
A bed, a table, a wardrobe, a bookshelf are the basic stuffs needed in a room... It is all you need to lead a simple life and spend your time...

what's the point??

2009-04-18T12:23:00.004+08:00

sld I say that it's a blessing or isit a torture for me???
I received a call from HIM yesterday nite... Reason being he's bored and not able to sleep.. I was awaken by his untimely call (make it 2 calls of 1 of dem is missed call), so not yet fully awaken I continued to talk 2 him.. But slowly slowly after shaking away my sub-conscienceness, I started to wonder why did I even bother to entertain him...

He talked abt _ _ _... which makes me wonder why does feelings for _ _ _ still stay, but not for me?
My emotions have been shaken since then... What am I thinking when I continue to hear him emphasizing on the fact that I hate to hear? How did I feel? Why did I choose not to react in the way I have "planned" within myself? I made "plans" for myself but all these have gone to waste... Why did I still entertained him when I know that I'm just a spare friend, a friend where he will only approach if all his friends are busy or unavailable at that moment, n he's bored to death... A spare friend that he will never put his heart into appreciating...

I hate to admit that, but I choose to believe that we dun have any common friends.. I choose not to disagree with him at the point of conversation 'cause I know if i do so, he will start to raise him voice saying how unreasonable n how unforgiving I am... SHUDDUP...

I'm just a tire in the garage, that will never be placed in the car for replacement uses... I will just stay where I'm left and collect layers of dust.. Only every now and then, when he has no more other tires den will he dig me out from layers of dirt and then when new purchased tires arrived, off I go into the pit of dirt again...

I'm betraying no one but myself..

prepared to die

2009-04-17T20:09:00.002+08:00

4 down, 2 to go...
YEAH~~

I'm prepared to die... so wish me luck...

Farewell to hall life…

2009-04-10T18:54:00.001+08:00

Although it is not time to move out of hall yet, but last thursday was the last day we are gg to get noisy with each other…

Hall life… Full of nonsense and entertainment within the Hall 3, Block 3B, 7th storey..

I’m going to miss u guys… =(

Presenting the Residence of #07-11 and #07-14 of Academic Year 08/09

Formal Shot

Informal Shot

Long Hair???

Nope… We have short hair… The long hair is wig…

Damn so IDOL rite??? LOL

We are WUSHU masters… Watch out for our WUSHU finger hold…

7-14 (Me and Qing), 07-11 (ShiHui and Melissa)

Me and with 2 sweets… =)

Lunch, Dinner, Supper (usually with Jiacheng too) together..

Laughters, Jokes, Singing, Shouting…

We are the same colour pair… Everytime wear so coincidentally wear same colour (as seen above)

Somehow the word “slugmon” will just appear whenever I see her.. LOL

Not saying that she looks like a slug or something, but she… nvm… haha… only we understand…

LOVE LOVE LOVE~~~ <3

My tutorial mate, MELISSA… so she’s my classmate (in simple terms).. hehex

She’s damn crazy over her “BUTT”

LOVE ME DUN GO~~~

-= INSINYUR GLs, JIAYOU =-

LOVE LOVE LOVE~~~ <3

Roomie --> KAIQING…

Sweet girl… GUY MAGNET… LOL

I’m so envious of her can~

Eat 24/7 but wun grow fat AT ALL… She’s like this size and will always be this size…

That’s so not fair… TOO UNFAIR…

That’s her fat POOH at the back btw…

LOVE LOVE LOVE~~~ <3

- FRENZ FOREVER -

Scrump – My plushIe =)

Count down to the totally stressless exam of my life...

2009-04-10T11:48:00.003+08:00

Counting down to my exams..

Totally not stressed, not because I'm prepared.. But it's due to mi partially giving up on all this damn modules...

I seriously hate engineering..

4 days to my exams...

SHITTO~

--------
Random: This is it... That's all... I'm rrly upset...

F**KING stupid~~~

2009-04-08T00:08:00.003+08:00

I will always be a backup... A sidekick will still be better..

F**KING JAP ORAL & LISTENING...

FREAKO LIFE SCI NOTES... Is these even notes???
They are not... They are shit... NONSENSE~

Exams

2009-04-06T22:24:00.001+08:00

Hmm exams... WHOA.. but I'm not anxious nor worried..

Not a good sign after all..

I'm feeling sleepy again.. hahaha

Time flies rrly fast...

2009-04-02T23:48:00.002+08:00

Thinking back... I have actually survived almost 1 year of university...
Stay in hall (away from home) for almost a year...

Have I become more independent?
Or m I still as childish as usual?

Deep inside me, the childish and craziness can never be eradicated.. It is in me.. Too me..

I need to get many presents... GOSH.. so gonna be broke for this month.. t.t

April Fool's

2009-04-01T18:33:00.002+08:00

Today is April Fool's Day...
How "April Fool" is April Fool's Day?

how truth is a joke?

This question sparked my thinking again..

I guess I'm still trying..

betrayal

2009-03-30T22:44:00.001+08:00

Is this betrayal?

Yes it is to me...
Yet it doesn't seem so...

do I still love him?

2009-03-30T00:22:00.002+08:00

Why did my tear dropped, even when I told myself not to?

What am I feeling?

This is the first time I find myself totally lost in this battle...
I died in this battle...
There is no more lives left for me to replay in this game...
It's the end...

To Christina

2009-03-29T21:17:00.002+08:00

Went to Causeway point for dinner together...
Accompanied Daddy to pasah malam...

When I saw it, it totally reminded me of Christina... Not saying that she has a auntie face or is she a fan of it... but I guess I just missed the times in IJC when there is not much of independence... Thinking back, I would prefer teachers to nag, to force use to finish our tutorials...

Eating Tutu Kueh, and my thoughts wondered even further...

About my birthday... although still a long way...

2009-03-29T21:10:00.002+08:00

I finally decided to S/U japanese...
Hmm.. it's a tough decision to make..

Thinking about my birthday this year, although it's still a long year, but there is already a event happening on that day...
and when my "aunt" coming to visit at that time (i believe), I dun think i'm interested to go..
INSINYUR Beach event...
doubt anyone remembers my birthday oso.. but it's the heat and the tot of a quiet birthday that is turning me away from this event...

Pray hard that they will postpone the event...
Cuz I dun think I wanna go out on my birthday...

I'm tired...

Triumph Sale~~

2009-03-28T22:41:00.002+08:00

GOSH~~
I guess I seriously shopping for undergarments..
hahah..

$108 damage done..

Not much size de lor.. haiz.
But lucky.. If not I will be spending even more then..

Show some consideration pls

2009-03-27T23:05:00.001+08:00

Show some consideration pls… This is for someone close to me…

But It’s definitely not my two sweeties, Siew n Christina…

At times, stop blasting your music… it’s irritating…

Hmm this post is all about my hall life..

5 words to describe it:

1. BORING

2. LONELY

3. RETARDED

4. FUN

5. LAZY

Sounded ironic rite?? But it’s rrly this way..

At times, it’s so boring, you would wanna die. Loneliness is depending on the presence or absence of roomie de… my greatest advice to all --> CHOOSE WISELY… Don’t regret once you made your decision…

SLOGAN:

Hall 3, the best hall ever existing…

air-con hall

lift access to all floors

clean and brightly lighted corridors

Nice room

Rather new furnitures…

LOVE IT~~~

My RETARDED yet FUN life in NTU hall 3:

We took 99 photos in a period of half hour..

Selectively chosen some to post it here.

My part of the room…

Cultural Appreciation Nite ~~<3

Babes from Block B - 7th Floor

Block B pals… – the guy is showing a “2” cuz he’s staying at 2nd floor…

A chance to go back to Abbort

2009-03-26T10:39:00.003+08:00

Dilemma..

I was given a opportunity to get back to my 1.4k job during my 3 months break..
But I choose to reject it..
WHY??

Reason:
1. Engineering camp, INSINYUR.. -.-"
2. Pepper Lunch (If I don't go back, I'll be killed..)

Haix.. Felt quite sad cuz I'm rrly interested and I would wish to go back de.. It will be so so much fun.. =)

The people there.. They are all so cute (esp the aunties) hehe.. =D
I loved my time there..

So touched that they still remember me and offered me such a job opportunity..
LOVE THEM TO BITS.. haha *grins*

PS: the damn professional is doing some drilling business upstairs.. DAMN...

I miss all of you

2009-03-25T18:30:00.001+08:00

I'm missing everybody...

~Random picture~

Scrump and Stitch (Boron series)

my loveD for him

2009-03-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

~Loving him is not about considering his strengths, but it's about accepting his flaws. ~

~When you love him, you will not complain what he did not give you, but cherish what he has given to you. ~

This two phrases was seen from somewhere and recorded in my handphone.. I was flipping through my drafts and I chanced upon this..

Thinking back..
Have I accepted his flaws or am I just forcing him to show his strengths?
Have I chrished what he gave to me and not grumbled about what he did not give?

I am guilty of both..
But did (or isit still "do"?) I love him?
Yes..

Hurting me more is not a issue here.
Emphasising on the fact of ZERO chance is definitely the most hurtful words.
In a way or another, I felt degraded too.

Why do he keep thinking that I'm still up to no good..
What rights does he have to assume that it's not time yet..

I used to believe that he's someone for me..
But not anymore.. Utter Disappointment, in his actions and the way he handles situation.

Why do I apologise when I know it's not my fault?
Reason is simple..
Cuz I wanna stop arguing..
But I guess he will never understand, and yet picking my apologies to reprimard me as well.

I used to wonder if I proved to him how much I loved him, will he changed his mind..
No No No.. not a chance for that.

Why? Who is it?
I'm still thinking..

Crying is all i can get from talking to u..

2009-03-23T02:31:00.001+08:00

Talking to you always ends up with me crying..

Crying is all i can get from talking to u..
or worse MSN-ing

Lookin back into my life..

2009-03-21T11:19:00.003+08:00

Looking back into my life..
I have changed quite alot.. My habits, my style of handling/doing things, thoughts, etc...

In the past, I used to think that distance is not a problem.. and that absence makes the heart grows fonder..
but I have chose to believe that DISTANCE is rrly an issue in a relationship.. Some may be able to handle it with ease, while others will just mess everything up...

I used to be more of a watch-tv-and-sleep person..
But now, I'm glued to my computer.. Maybe it's because waiting for him to appear on MSN has already became a habit, and that assuming that he's online would also means that he's fine...

I started to sense the distancing between the 2 of us quite early, but I tried to persuade myself to think otherwise... Why add oil to the existing fire? I started taking initiatives and stuffs, cuz I know that it's tough for him to initiate all the time..

I tend to like stay quiet or choose not to voice out my views when I feel that I would like to stop the argument.. But his characters is to get an explanation for everything.. And now, I'm like that.. I changed because?? I duno myself..

I have to admit honestly that I'm too dependent and reliant of him... It's the emotional and psychological thinking that he's around with me... he's there to back me back..
But when he is gone, the physical issue is still the same.. Still as far.. So the only difference I felt is that he's no longer around for me.. and I have to handle everything all on my own..

I feel that we sort of switched our characters through these (3years - 2 weeks)..

I'm starting to wonder where is DUMPY?
as LUMPY is still lying on my bed, but I never touched it since..

2009-03-17T11:28:00.002+08:00

I love to appear offline... Mayb I guess it's a quiet way of being involved in a "society"..

Christina just bombarded me with a sudden question in de early morning... WHOA~~

Random tot of the day:
Walking around NTU seems like a tour in Mainland..

Sore and sour

2009-03-15T23:42:00.001+08:00

Why am I feeling still sore and sour??

What's happening to me??

Damn Facebook

2009-03-14T14:58:00.003+08:00

Wad the F*** is there a need to change the homepage of Facebook?? It's so messy and.. damn disorganised...
Dun like it... BLAH~~~

-----------------------------------
Siew told me something... and I thought through it..

all I can say is that:
Dun pretend that you care when u actually don't bother.. Why make yourself seem like Mr Nice Guy to everybody around?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2009-03-14T13:31:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthday to my Laopo, SIEW FONG..

She's officially 20 years old.. Stepped into the Lao Char Bo category liao... hehehe.. =)

utter shock...

2009-03-12T02:49:00.001+08:00

SHOCKED by the fact that he actually come to talk to me.. seriously... I never tot he will...

MY EYECANDY~~~

2009-03-09T13:47:00.002+08:00

LOL i love my eyecandy!! and mel too.as in i love mel, not mel love my eyecandy.

He's damn cute can...~~~ (like mel --> as requested by her)
he's 2000bucks richer now... and just got 80buck poorer cuz he treated us to SAKAE SUSHI~~~

Drove us back to hall cuz it's raining.. If there's no rain, cheapo guy wun even drive us back lor.. LOL.. Sat in the front seat.. OMG... so happy..

Happiest day of my life sia...
My laopo aka eyecandy~~~

Hey there, MR Gorgeous~~~

2009-03-08T15:21:00.001+08:00

Today is Reina’s vain day.. went far east to try on extensions with Melissa… We were quite worried if they will chase us out if we only wanted 1 or 2 strands each on our hair.. LOL but nope… Wrong… They are very friendly.. hahaha

I did 8 strands (2 red, 6 purple –> which turned rather blue when under sunlight, if not it’s totally obvious-less") while Melissa did 2 red strands… Can see the red strand on our hair ma?? (see above picture) LOL

Then we headed down to West Coast Plaza to support my beloved “wife” aka Teddy aka Hey Gorgeous NTU finalist… We alighted at Clementi and was wondering where to stop and stuffs when suddenly, a West Coast Plaza Shuttle Bus stopped right in front of us.. We are like “West Coast Plaza… Hmm very familiar but who cares…~~~” and we ignored the bus… Until like moments later when we look at each other and “What the heck, it’s West Coast Plaza!!!”… The bus uncle instructed us to proceed to the front of the bus stop to board de bus but by then (due to de brain lag), long queue liao…

So nvm… We took 189 instead…

Being very auntie, we (actually is only I’m the very auntie one) redeemed a goodie bag for STUDENTS only… =)

Guest appearance: Darren Tan, Nat Ho & Fiona Xie

NTU was the first to appear.. *CLAP CLAP CLAP*

帅哥 & 美女

Melissa and me… Crazy-ing..

PS: See the boy behind… That’s Teddy’s nephew… LOL

Round 2: Talent showcasing… Teddy sang 你最珍贵

Round 3 (Left with Top 3 guys & Top 4 Girls): 快智快答

Teddy being asked a qns about if his best friend tells him that he like him, what will he do?

Winner announced: Teddy from NTU… Wohohoho~~~

Double winners… =) Both from NTU

Me with my coloured extension… =) Red and purple…

Pardon my messy background… LOL my damn messy room… oops

Absolute Boyfriend

2009-03-05T17:29:00.002+08:00

Siew Fong gt me hooked to "Absolute Boyfriend" (Zettai Kareshi)...
Stupid girl... LOL

But that guy is so so perfect.. OMG..

Thinking about it.. In the past, I tend to say stuffs like "I want my bf to be cute/shuai". But looking at it, I dun seem to deserve it.. so I guess as people become more matured, they start to think differently.. I want my Mr. Right to be caring and attentive.. That's all I am hoping for.. Mayb because I have been lacking the feeling of being taken care of, being pampered.. Thus that's rrly all I hope for.. I just need the feeling of being a pampered lady FOR ONCE..

I'm not asking for alot.. But it seem to me that no one is for me..

Dead or alive?

2009-03-04T23:24:00.003+08:00

Arrows targetted at you.. pierced right through you...

Do you take a shield to protect youself?
or do you let them pierce through you, den you slowly remove them one by one, then slowly bleed to death??
or rush to the hospital to treat yourself??

Thoughts~~~

2009-03-01T23:21:00.003+08:00

some guy msged me sudd AGAIN.. and that triggered me to think about J again.. J once sort of quarrelled with that guy cuz he msged me and J told him off.. Felt so protected at that time.. But this time the guy msged me again.. n I guess I wanna ignore it..

In the past, J used to be the only person that revolved around my life. He may not treat me the way I hope he would, but still he is someone very important to me.. Very very important.. But upon his walk-away, I seem to lose a part of myself.. I was rrly not used to the fact that I can no longer call him to talk, no longer msg him just to report my where-abouts and what-doings.
till now, I'm still tryin to get used.. I'm rrly trying my best..

本来 - 同恩

下雨了站在玻璃门里头
并没有总是挂念着我
你带着雨伞来接我
夜晚了只剩老板跟我
像从前你抽着烟皱眉头
不知怎么安抚太任性的我

本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了
手写的留言对象
已经不会是我

停雨了不必再躲雨了
已经过了该打烊的时候
还是不太想走
太晚了只能坐计程车
为什么想念着摩托车
常常会半路熄火的后座

本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你放弃爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了
长长的简讯对象
已经不会是我

走在湿漉漉红砖道上
沿着导盲砖试着假装
的确有点困难
也许我就这样走路回家
反正你不再在乎几点
该几点回到家

本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你再也不疼我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再保护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你放弃爱我以后
来不及了
对不起长大太慢
害你遗失了我
抱歉让你白费了这么多

~It's hard to forget someone that you know you'll always remember~
~~It's really hard to let go of someone you love.. But there are times that you have to let go... not because you want it that way, it's because it's more painful to hang on and wait for nothing..~~

蔡依林 - 离人节

2009-02-27T13:50:00.000+08:00

不再见面不代表我不再对你想念

你是曾经的永远

会永远在我身边

~was listening to this song... So decided to post a phrase from the song..~
~~Random~~

Jokes have a little truth in it

2009-02-27T12:16:00.002+08:00

Someone told me this before.. and I guess this statement will remain in my memory for the rest of my life..

Jokes have a little sense of truth in it..

So even if you say you are joking, but deep deep inside your heart, it is a fact which you wanted to say but choose not to say, thus protraying it as a joke..

Thus upon hearing this statement, I never treat jokes as jokes anymore, but little truths that wanted to be kept untold yet accidentally leaked out..

What is jokes? There is no such things as jokes.. Why create jokes out of others? Is it fun? It may be fun for you, but not the poor "joker"..

Thinking back, some how the truths I heard seem to be turning into jokes now... So are jokes and truths changing identity? or is it always been this way but I'm too dumb to notice until now?

I guess I have been the ultimate joker.. Even till now..
Just get me out of my well..

~Just some random post about my random tots~

Regrets

2009-02-23T14:38:00.003+08:00

Tot that it will be fine I wished him good luck for his journey back to aust..
Now i'm regretting I said that..

Cuz it seem that I made myself look so desperate...
But what can I do now? I have already done so and nothing can be undone..

1 person @ 3 places..

2009-02-20T23:09:00.001+08:00

Is it possible to be at 3 places at the same time??

1. GL Gathering @ Pasir Ris
2. Peiying Gang Gathering aka birthday celebration
3. 0612G Gathering aka sending-off party for Naphtali..

Dots.. Why all clash on the same day???

my definition of hall

2009-02-18T21:55:00.002+08:00

Hall aka Hostel.

A place where I'm confined to only a room and a common balcony (so glad that I'm on the 7th floor)..

A place that is so confined relative to a home in which you will spend great time thinking about issues, be it important or not.. thinking abt sorrowful issues.. stressing over exams and quizes.. This is the reason why I choose to pour my tears here instead of my home.. There is nothing much to do here, other than a roomie, laptop and a common TV lounge to accompany you..

Will I not cry so much if I never stayed in hall??
Can I get over you faster if I never stayed in hall??

A balcony where it can be full with fun and laughter, at the same time, the most condusive place and environment to cry..
Dim and open-air.. The best place to tear in the open, yet unseen by others.. Only with the accompaniment of the moon and the stars shining above you..

I love my hall, at the same time wonder if it's the right decision for me to stay here at my most "vulnerable" moment of my life..

To forgive and then you can forget.. How true is that statement?? And how do I forgive?? I forgot the feeling of forgiving others..

Hidden Meaning of my name

2009-02-17T14:09:00.001+08:00

What's the hidden meaning of my name?

You Are Carefree and Passionate

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.
You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.
Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia.
Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.

You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life.
You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone.
Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.

You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.
And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.
You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.
You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.
You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.

left ambiguous

2009-02-17T08:39:00.003+08:00

I wanna know something.. I really wanna know..

But it seem that it's left ambiguous on purpose... To hide something or to hint something??
Some words may have multiple meanings..
while Some words are sincerely truthful..

I guess that all I need to know..

~~It's an irony~~
~~A irony too hard to handle~~

I found out he unblock me...

2009-02-15T09:52:00.001+08:00

Sld I continue hiding?? Or sld I come out to accept the fact??

2009-02-14T23:37:00.001+08:00

Some things are meant to be hidden, and they will stay hidden.. Some things are meant to be announced... Some things are meant to be kept confidential, while some things are purposely let out..

Ignorance is bliss...
I wish to believe in this...

Christina's 20th Birthday.

2009-02-14T19:25:00.003+08:00

My ever first ton-over at someone's else house... LOL

I rushed from NTU to collect the nice, chio helium foil balloons x 5 and rushed to Plaza Singapura to buy Sweetheart's present with Sophia... I'm so so glad the uncle gave me a ultra big plastic bag to collect my balloons if not it's going to be so malu la~~~

That stupid girl tell me say she want to sleep earli sia... make us all so gan jiong.. walked freaking fast to her house.. and then dere she is, watching DRAMA~~~ (-.-")

ton-ned at Sophia's house until de nex morning before i rushed back to NTU again.. for boring jap.. zzz...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTINA...

-------------------------------------

Things to do during Recess Week:
1. Business Management Project
2. GL gathering
3. GL Mass Dance (Best Fren - Toy Box)
4. Meet Darling and Sweetheart aka Siew n Tina...
5. Slack my way through
6. Work~~~

My new love

2009-02-11T18:14:00.003+08:00

MY NEW LOVE <3

SCRUMP..

It's so adorable... So cute... So retarded looking yet so innocent...

If there is anyone who buy this extra-large 70cm SCRUMP for me.. I'll love the person to bits..

Valentime's Day is nearing... This year, I'm all alone... although it's the same as past few years, when he is not around me physically, at least I know dere is someone out there who love me.. (This is an assumption I hope to hold on to..)

Sad, upset & hurt but I guess I have no choice..

Singapore Flyer..

2009-02-10T20:42:00.001+08:00

Safra members can obtain free passes to Singapore Flyer… so being auntie and uncle, my family decided to give it a try since it’s FREE!!!~~~ LOL

WHOA!!! I TELL U!!!

THE VIEW IS…

…

NOT VERY FANTASTIC LA~~~

Just alrite lor… cuz everywhere around is still under construction… Nothing much to view..

But I repeat.. Since it’s FREE, we have saved ($29.90 x 4 = ) $119.60..

We are like the 1st “customer” la.. technically not really considered as a “customer” as we did not pay for it.. We gt this FREE~~~

Before the ride..

The view:

Not very fantastic as I mentioned.. as every here and there, there is unfinished construction.

The happenings inside the cubicle..

The first thing my sis did is to do that.. –.-” really zi lian sia…

My turn… LOL…

I trying to “stunt” with my 2sec camera timer… SHIONG sia~~~

(See my hair.. it’s still flying) Action shot sia!!!

My “3-8” sister started to join in with the timer thingy…

This picture look so fake rite??? As if I’m standing in front of a blue screen then superimposed de lor… hahaha

We are reaching~~~

DAMN~~~ it's over… T.T

This view is taken from the Singapore Flyer gift shop… Can I say that it’s artistic… LOL~~~

Teddy zeng

2009-02-02T13:50:00.002+08:00

眼睛糖果 was sitting beside me during lab today... LOL..

and the best thing is we are sharing a ipod together.. wahahhaha.. *blush blush*

I'm starting to miss the feeling of being loved... The feeling of which you know someone is out there to protect and shower love on you... The warmth feeling, the gentle touch, the sweet smile.. But all these are gone for me... I'm just left here all alone...

Chingay Day 2

2009-02-01T15:30:00.001+08:00

Day 2 is hell (as continued from the previous blog entry)

Stand the whole day… OMG…

legs almost broke sia…

Saruman Gls STAR

This is my POV..

Note: the guy with his arms stretched out.. He’s freaking cute.. LOL.. standing beside me sia…

NTU Dragon Float… Yayness..

We snapped this while forming the human barricade for VIPs.. LOL.. eating snake here~~

Sit at the edge of Connaught Drive until 1am… Then we decided to officially walk around… Walk into CITY ALIVE!!! i mean.. hehex…

Clubbers, breakdancers everywhere…

And tada… A cigarette burnt mark on my hand.. A breakdancer swings his hand back while I walked past and the next thing I know, I kena burn liao.. T.T

Pain like shit la~~~

Hope it doesn’t learn a scar.. Sobx..

半情歌

2009-02-01T15:04:00.002+08:00

半情歌
詞:陳靜楠曲:方文良編曲:吳俊毅

花接受凋零風接受追尋
心的傷還有一些不要緊
我接受你的決定
你將會被誰抱緊唱什麼歌哄他開心
我想著天空什麼時候會放晴
地球不曾為誰停一停
你的明天有多快樂不是我的
(我的明天快不快樂都是我的)
我們的愛是唱一半的歌
時間把習慣換了傷口癒合
也撤銷我再想你的資格
你的祝福一半甜的一半苦的
像我手中冷掉的可可
最最教人殘念的總是未完成的
我只能唱著一半的歌

Chingay 2009 Day 1

2009-02-01T15:01:00.001+08:00

Chingay briefing was like 2 weeks ago and at that point of time I’m still mentioning that Chingay is a long way to go, but POOF.. it’s over le.. time rrly flies..

I was camwhoring in my hall at the same time checking the battery life… (excuses!!~~ hahaha)

They chartered a bus (which is not enough for all of us) and we took cab in de end…

LATE LATE LATE!!!~~~

My OG GLs of Insinyur 09…

Moses.. My ex-eyecandy.. He’s from BPGHS sia.. GASP!!! LOL

nice guy but sure like to disturb mi.. –.-"

My Dearest neighbour + Tut mate – MELISSA

So glad to have her as a GLs as well… n Damn lucky we are both in the underworld clan.. if not I’ll like die alone…

Real horse sia!!! But I believe its white mane and tail is wig like de.. unless it’s bleached…

Here comes the artistic shots…

Finally Day 1 is over…

Stupid Dajun, acting so innocent and stuffs… purposely appear in our photo de lor.. LOL

Day 2 is hell… ahahahaha

你的承诺 - 海鸣威泳儿

2009-01-31T13:54:00.001+08:00

你的承诺

海鸣威泳儿

乌云遮蔽了天空

窗外又是阴雨时候

伞下的恋人中

不再有你我手牵手

一切过了太久

我们的十字路口

下一站是谁在等候

你我的方向盘却向着

相反的彼岸

终点还是分开

告别你我离开之后

这回忆可以保留

当初那美好的感动

你说你记住了

不为彼此难过过

各自的生活 oh baby~

你答应我的我都记得

但是你却忘了你的承诺

不是说好彼此都不再联络

谁都别再犯错

是我的固执让你难过

但是分手却也无法选择

我走了以后你要好好生活

不要想我也别再哭了

Have been trying to find this song for very long.. finally found it, de first thing I felt is hurt though... No reason to explain why..

My CNY without you

2009-01-29T09:27:00.007+08:00

My CNY 2009
Celebrated with no tears in my eyes yet with a broken heart..
So glad that I still have my primary skool pals and family with me..

CLASS 6A/2001 of PEIYING Pri

Jion Chun

Ben Tan

Weiming

Yuguang

Keith

Katat

Zhengyou

Mrs Tsui

My dearest Lizi..

Jaclyn is in Msia... MISS HER!!!

Me in Ben's fake specs... STUDIOUS LA~~~

6A Girls...

Mummy and sis

Sis being retarded...

2 cousins of me (twins) trying to prove how short I m..

Sis n me at reunion dinner @ Seoul Garden

Daddy n me!!!~~~

CRYSTAL~~~

The ladies + a baby... LOL

My family with our complimentary yu sheng platter...

<3>

WHY??

No need to clear up the area..

Got variety of food, ranging from main course to dessert

But it's expensive.. t.t

I am a tulip

2009-01-28T17:33:00.002+08:00

There was one day.. Me and Christina is discussing about flowers and we concluded that she is a black rose... pretty yet lethal.. I'm a tulip.. Delicate and sensitive to changes....

A uncommonrose.. a black rose.. Full of elegance and grace yet lethal... One of a kind..

a common tulip... With just the proper temperature and surrounding, can be found anywhere and everywhere.. Being sensitive to changes, I will just wither and die easily..

That's so many differences between a common flower and a unique flower..
too much differences to discuss..
too much attention gap between both..

A tulip will require more care and concern due to its sensitivity, and thus with that.. it's called demanding?? Is it fair??

No one is the same kind of flower..

2009-01-22T15:58:00.003+08:00

Midnite Fiesta..

Hall 3

Fun, Full, Fatty~~

Triple Fs.. = Terrible but enjoyable..

Being Gluttons, din managed to snap fotos of Supper Food, shall grab the photo from Melissa soon..

The Chinatown Feeling.. =D

Me and Melissa...

Shi Hui and Me..

Jia Cheng and me..

I cannot believe I'm seeing this in ChinaTown... MacDonald's in Chinese... WTF!!! SO COOL!!!

Or isit that all people know that and I'm the only one who duno???

2009-01-20T08:50:00.004+08:00

Met up with WanYan for lunch today.. =) She brought weiwren along too.. Very long never see them le..
finally gt a chance to xu4 xu4 jiu4... haaa...

hmm regreting never apply for NIE course... Cuz i'm dying in Engineering..

WanYan, Thanks for consoling me whenever I'm feeling down.. A very trustworthy fren..
Thanks for your accompaniment...

=)
May you find a true love... Cuz you are pure and true..

Genie Zhuo Wen Xuan

2009-01-18T14:33:00.003+08:00

I was working yesterday.. During my work, I found out that Genie Zhuo is singing.. for her autograph session... She's so pretty... Something I can never achieve in my life, next life and forever...

一句話 - 卓文萱

愛上你　那時愛到不象話

後來　想盡辦法忘掉

到最後　我就合上嘴巴

多說像對自己撒謊

星空下說永恒　額頭上的吻

你雙手將我環繞

未來即便它是　一個問號

也能對自己炫耀

＊有一句話　再也都聽不到

那些過往　只好放在心上

你愛我　太美好　時間會知道

怎樣去　熬成一句動人的話

＃有一句話　再也都聽不到

那些過往　讓它自己燃燒

我愛你　太美好　時間會知道

怎樣去　熬成動人一句話

記憶裡說我們　相同的体溫

一想到就不會冷

未來永遠都是　一個問號

也是種天荒地老　

這是一種成長　還是一種逞強

我的寂寞很善良　陪我到任何地方

有一句話　再也都聽不到

那些過往　越呼吸越明亮

我愛你　太美好　時間它一定會

把它熬成世上最動人的話

Confused yet determined..

Determined yet confused..

2009-01-17T23:20:00.003+08:00

My door is still locked... No matter how my frenz tried to knock on my door, I only seem to be talking to them through the small little peek-hole..

Why isit so?? Cuz I'm afraid to open the door to let anybody in anymore.. Anybody.. Everybody..

I'm all confused inside.. But even if I were to say my feelings out. People might understand but they will not know how I feel towards my life, towards my education.. Towards everything..

I lives in my own fairytale.. But I can never be the princess in that fairytale of mine.... sounded complexed?? yes it is, cuz i dun know how to explain it myself..

If any fren of mine think I'm all fake and everything.. den I can only say you dun treat me as a fren as well... I will never try to be fake in front of you, my frens...

All confused

2009-01-15T15:34:00.001+08:00

I'm all confused again..

What should I do?
What should I not do?

Life is tough for me.. I'm not sure about u.. But I rrly hope that you are doing fine..

Wanyan, xueting and wei wren..

2009-01-15T13:58:00.002+08:00

Saw wanyan, xueting and wei wren in NIE yesterday.. LOL
that's is like an achievement leh..

Cuz I never see dem before... Maybe for wanyan, I saw her once.. hahah

But since I'm in NIE territory yesterday, the chances of bumping into them is way higher.. but Yups..

Still quite glad I saw dem.. =D

2009-01-14T17:31:00.003+08:00

A new blog name..

A new life..

A new environment..

But same Blogskin..

what a irony...!!!
---------------------

I went for a blood test today..
all thnks to my joints..

Paid $134.85 and 12ml of my precious blood..

At the same time I decided to test for (whatever).. I duno how to spell...

and WTF!!!
MY FOOT GT BRUISE... WHY??

CUZ A STUPID LADY STEPPED ON MY FEET ON THE BUS WITH HER HEELS..

2009-01-11T23:35:00.003+08:00

To forget is my priority now..

I decided to unblock you so that I can train myself from seeing you online yet control myself from not wanting to talk to you... until this crucial period is over le, den talking will commence again..

But I dun see you online.. haix...

2009-01-10T12:49:00.002+08:00

Actu I have been wondering.. Is it my fault?? Or to what extend is my fault??? Do we share the fault?? Den why isit that I'm the one officially being blamed?? I'm the one being all alone..

Sec school frenz all gone... Try to figure and find out that's the problem, but no one out there wanted to tell me...

Someone.. Just anyone.. Tell me what's going on in the past.. I dun wanna have so many question marks in my life...

Looking back into my life.. I guess I should completely leave out my sec skool life as I am left with nothing..

Who will be out there to pity me?? No one!!

Isit my fault to stay with 1 clique?? but isit this called loyality??
Does loyality backfire? I guess it will happen to me and only me..

To what happened that has happened during my sec skool life, I try not to cry, I try to forgive..
Forgiven but without any reason, which makes forgiving very unstable..
Cried and still crying cuz no reason is valid for me to stop crying..

What did I do wrong?? What did I not do??

I dun even know if it is what I do or what did I not do?

I have forgiven...
But am I forgiven??

Jealousy??

2009-01-09T13:23:00.001+08:00

Green with envy???

Same situation... ME - Sick and not able to walk well.. But no one is dere for me.. I'm all alone to die??

Others - Sick yet having their loved ones around with dem???

Is this jealousy or is this just my fate??

Woke up with a bad sore..

2009-01-09T10:23:00.004+08:00

Woke up with a bad sore on my knee and in my throat..

I'm starting to hate NTU, cuz of all the stairs and everything..

but I guess I'm so glad my hall has a lift...

Why did you ask me if I'm in hall??
Cuz u are so nearby but u told me u r not free?

So near yet so far.. And I admit I'm feeling upset over it..

But at least I'm glad you are having fun and not sulking like me...

~~ The problem with fairytales is that they set a girl up for disappointment..
In real life, the prince goes off with the wrong princess.
Or the spells wear off and two lovers realise they are better off with whatever they are...~~
-- Quoted from Gossip Girl S2..

~~ Every once in a while, a girl craves for her fairytale ending, so sleep tight.. ~~
-- Quoted from Gossip Girl S2

Sick

2009-01-09T02:04:00.002+08:00

Down with a sore throat and a fever...

And GREAT!!! my right knee hurts like crazy... It's like I totally cannot bend it... COMPLETELY...

Hope it doesn't get worse...

Miss you being nice to me...

2009-01-06T20:43:00.002+08:00

sorry for calling u to disturb u..

I know to you now, I'm just a irritating fellow... childish little girl that cries to get what she wants..

But I guess that's all I can do to convey my message for u..

Promised myself not to cry but could not control..
Cried through the conversation, cried till now..

I LOVE u.. and I am glad you LOVED me before.. (I hope so)

To me, promises are nothing but words.. I accept the reasoning on not promising anything or even considering about anything..

But regarding FATE, I beg to differ...
We should be controling FATE but not the other way...

I will continue to wait... And I'm very serious about it.. I'll wanna prove to you that I'm dead serious about you..

All I can do is to hope for a chance.. ~~Some day I wish upon a star...~~

I know you are serious too.. Sorry for all the inconvenience that I have brought to you..
I'm wishing for a chance...

I still love you...

All by myself...

2009-01-05T13:18:00.002+08:00

I roamed around west side alone.. Walked the path I used to walk alone..
Nostalgic yet alien... why???
New yet lost.. is it good or bad??

Held my tears back as it's broad daylight..
If it's late at nite.. I will choose to cry it out..

U have already choose to go and has gone far away.. But I'm still hoping to linger around you... Why? I thought to myself.. Why?

The reason is obvious yet un-tell-able...
Smile is sincere yet fake...
Attitude is warm yet cold...

I'm clueless on what should I do now..

in front of u

2009-01-04T21:33:00.001+08:00

I feel so fake in front of u..

Have to potray a cheery attitude, if not u wouldn't even talk 2 me..

I feel so upset for myself... How pathetic!!!

2009-01-04T16:22:00.004+08:00

I waited for him to get his driving license..

I waited for him to come back after his studies..

But it seemed like all my wait has gone to waste...
I'm not the first to sit in his car...
I'm not the first he wanted to meet upon arrival...

I'm still missing you..

Utter disappointment in you

2009-01-03T14:05:00.004+08:00

utter disappointment...

Guilty conscience???
Guess so..
If not why defense so fast??

Deep inside my heart

2009-01-02T14:38:00.002+08:00

Deep deep inside my heart...

I still hope that there is a place left for me in his heart...

Recent Photos

2009-01-02T11:04:00.005+08:00

This post shall be all about photos...

0612G gathering... =D

Sweetheart and me..

Le Shan n me

Melissa n me...

LOVE IS IN THE AIR!!!

GIRL POWER!!!!

Half de class of 0612G

SHOPPING WITH CHRISTINA!!!

Angel or Devil???

Peace or Middle Finger???

Or isit something else??

Personal message to all

2009-01-01T13:20:00.005+08:00

My personal messages to the important people in my life... (not in order of importance)

LEE SIEW FONG
my darling aka laopo...
Hope you graduate with style and yes, I owe u many meetups.. hehe..
both of us are very busy with stuffs like work.. but U are my century-long fren.. Remember that.. whahahah

CHRISTINA KOH
Miss Clubber.. my Sweetheart
Dun get yourself too drunk k? Cuz u r still a girl after all, a pretty one summore.. And as u know, u are a colour-wolf magnet.. so Be careful ah... whahaha.. Take care and I miss shopping with you.. Although our character is like totally North-South poles, but We are both damn good in "PR" rite??? U - personal, I - public... whahahahah... Muacks

MELISSA LIM
Char Bo...
All the best to your love life... I know it's getting along well... Go with the FEEL... and u wun regret it... =D
GOSH!!! Did I hear wedding bells??? LOL...

PEIYING GANG
Damn big group of ppl.
Enjoy supper with them... Sure full of entertainment and joy de... Although most of us are going different paths but we are still bonded.. Stay Bonded and Happy.. =D

HIM
Memories awaiting to be forgotten..
Hope he find his true love soon..
A true love in which he is willing to be committed and pay full attention to..
He may have gone through ups and downs in his life.. But still I hope he do his best in everything he is willing to put his heart in....

My official Resolution for 2009

2009-01-01T13:13:00.002+08:00

My official Resolution for 2009
To stay happy, no matter what happens...

Forget the memories and Life goes on..

Today is the 1st day of 2009

will I be happy, will I be upset??
It is all up to me to decide...

Wishing all my frenz a HAPPY NEW YEAR..

BLESS YOU ALL WITH GOOD LUCK AND BEST WISHES...

A brand new year - 2009

2008-12-31T15:04:00.002+08:00

In less than 10 hours, 2008 will be gone and here comes 2009...

A brand new year
A brand new start
A brand new ME!!!

I have to stop remembering the past..
Even though what I have left are the memories, be it sweet or sad..
I have decided to let go all..

To forget is the best way to live on..

Frens are..
those who care for you wholehearted..
So only those who fall into this catagory are considered my frens..

My resolutions...
To stay strong
Improve my GPA (cuz it suck like shit)

Will update when I think of more...

Welcome to Rumpy..

2008-12-28T12:43:00.002+08:00

For my Christmas present from my mum... So thoughtful of her.. Muackx..

She bought me a Dumpy-alike elephant.. Not of same brand though... So still not very compatible with Lumpy... But still, I decided to call it Rumpy...

To replace Dumpy is what Rumpy can do.. To stay by Lumpy's side to accompany her is what Rumpy has to do..

I want to find my Rumpy too..

-----------------------------------------------

Heard that Melissa is going on well with her love life... So happy for her.. =)

Christina is enjoying life.. Glad for her too... Love you sweetheart... heeheh =D

Assumption kills

2008-12-27T00:26:00.002+08:00

Let's assume that I have gotten over him and that I'm able to handle any emotional issue regarding him...

I unblocked him finally...

But as he mentioned all the time, ASSUMPTION KILLS..

So should I still continue with this assumption and let it destroy me or should I reassure myself once more?

-----------------------------------------------

Tomorrow I'm off from work, and I'm going out with 2 groups of frenz...
Peiying Gang - 4 of us nia.. -.-" (to buy deco... )
0612G - so glad to be able to c my DARLING Christina and DEAR Melissa...

And guess what... Stupid Melissa came to find me at IMM Pepper Lunch today while I'm gossiping during work... OOPS... hahaha...

I'm officially broke... With nothing left in my bank account and only a $10 left in my wallet... with some 5 cents coins

His appeal letter..

2008-12-19T09:09:00.003+08:00

Once again, I found out something I should not know... I'm seriously being too nosy...
The blame is on me.. But is it true???
I'm the victim here... Yes I do agree I play a part but I'm not the one who voiced out...

I guess my existance here is not needed anymore, since I am always the bad-guy around..
This has officially proven that my existance in your life is redundant..

I hope u make the best choice for yourself...
Which I know you have done so very well...

What is the point of still appearing every now and then, still worrying about you and having concerns.. All these are made redundant.. Totally redundant..

Tears falling this time, I hope is the last time for you...

Reina's quote of the day:
World's most beautiful sentence ~ But, I love U....
World's most painful sentence ~ I love U but...

back from malacca...

2008-12-17T23:49:00.005+08:00

I'm back from Malacca...

Bought stuffs for my cutie little ahbugs...
This time round, I din rrly bought much... Not to my liking I guess...

--------------------------------------------

Should I or should I not block him on MSN?
I noe that he doesn't wanna talk 2 me... N I'm not sure if I can control myself from not talking to him..

So should I or should I not???
haix...

My MSN nick is usually regarding him directly or indirectly... But I'm not sure if it's the right choice to let him see it or not..

Quite worried about his studies now... even though I'm not supposed to bother abt him anymore... But somehow deep inside me, I'm hoping to help him as much as possible.. If only he would approach me, which I doubt he will..

I still love you, but it will never be the same anymore as it is all about me only, instead of me and you...

--------------------------------------------

Should I listen to my mother or my heart???
I need a life of my own... Esp my love life...

me n me alone..

2008-12-17T23:49:00.003+08:00

Me n me alone...

accepting this and is getting over it..

I miss u.. but I doubt you will ever know... or even bother about me..

He called me...

2008-12-15T13:45:00.004+08:00

I blocked him in MSN, cuz I wanna stop myself from talking 2 him.. but de shocking thing is that he called me instead... to tell me abt his university...

He told me that he tried MSNing me but no reply from my side.
Stunned for a moment..

I have been avoiding him for 23 days...

I have to be determined... I must continue to forget him.... if not everything I have been tryin to convince myself to do will gO to waste..

Even if he were to talk 2 me now, I believe it has got nothing to do with feelings anymore, it's more abt he wanting to find someone to talk to... That's all.. He will never come back to me, not now, never in the future, so I don't need to read too much from his actions...

2008-12-12T00:00:00.002+08:00

BPGHS march-back...

Should I go or should I not go??

Choice 1:
I go alone to just to satisfy myself for I have been waiting for the construction to be done...

Choice 2:
Not go at all and be filled with regrets

Choice 3:
Go alone and hide at a corner... to hoping to feel the celebrating atmosphere..

Choice 4:
Thick skinned and ask others if I could join.. (knowing that I am not welcomed)

I have to make a decision soon...
What should I do?

2008-12-11T23:49:00.002+08:00

Tolerance is not a new word in my dictionary... But I really dun hope to be its best fren...

I have been tolerating...

If you don't even feel like meeting up, please have the courtesy to inform me that you are not available... N not wait for me to ask you again..

Thnks

2008-12-08T00:21:00.002+08:00

Britney Spears - Sometimes...

You tell me you’re in love with me
Like you can’t take your pretty eyes away from me
It’s not that I don’t want to stay
But every time you come too close I move away

I wanna believe in everything that you say
‘Cause it sounds so good
But if you really want me, move slow
There’s things about me you just have to know

Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I’m scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right, be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time

I don’t wanna be so shy
Every time that I’m alone I wonder why
Hope that you will wait for me
You’ll see that you’re the only one for me

Just hang around and you’ll see
There’s nowhere I’d rather be
If you love me, trust in me
The way that I trust in you

PS: Quite a long ago song... but I started to fall in love with this song once again... Cuz this is wad I rrly hope to tell him... He is irreplacable in my heart..

What I am tryin to control now is not to think of him whenever I close my eyes to sleep...
Today is the 15th day since I last talked to him... This is the 1st time I never talked to him for so long... I have to perserve.. Be determined not to talk 2 him.. Cuz that's what he wanted...

Somehow I guess working really helps... Cuz my mind will be occupied with something else for me to think about him...

The last time I see him is 1 year ago.. And this year he did not come back during his mid year break so I am even more eager to see him during his year-end holidays.. But since such things happen, my eagerness is all wasted... And is all bcuz of this double-eagerness, I cannot seem to be able to accept the fact that what's gone is gone... He will never come back anymore...
Why am I still having hopes that he will come back? I dun understand myself anymore..

2008-12-06T22:37:00.002+08:00

My arm now ache like shit...
Just jab Typhoid vaccination..
A muz to jab for FnB...

Occupy my mind...

2008-12-01T18:29:00.002+08:00

I have been tryin to occupy my mind with anything...
Everybody might see me as someone strong, being able to handle the changes.. But it's not true, so not true...
Crying in the shower helps as there are many excuses available to make..

I'm starting work soon.. Real soon... Although I might have to forgo my choir, times with my friends, but I guess I am able to do so... Cuz I don't feel like stepping into my room.. Starting to dislike it to a still-controlable-extent.. I'm not sure when will I max my tolerance...

This is not an inside-an-office-sit-and-slack-in-aircon job... F&B this time.. Guess I want to include more changes in my life...

Need to learn more and adapt to changes... <-- Hope to achieve that...

U wanted us to stop talking, I accepted that..
I wonder when will we ever talk again.. 1 yr? 2 yrs? or never? It's not up to me to decide anymore as I have completely no more say to anything.

Next time in life..
Peiying 10th Anniversary Friendship dinner...
Sounds Cool.. Looking forward to it..
Will recce the venue tomorrow.. Going karaoke aft that.. Hope to get some emotions off..

Today is an important day to him... His results... Wishing him all the best.. Pray hard for him...
Seriously, I am wondering why isit that everytime whenever I go to pray, I pray for his safety, his studies, everything as well.. HAHAH.. That must be so so dumb of me... doubt he need me to do that...

Reina.. Get a NEW life...!!!

My boring Holiday...

2008-11-27T14:22:00.004+08:00

My boring holiday starts now...

Boring Boring Boring..

Latest update:
My outing with Siew Siew to watch "I like-a move it move it..."

Din rrly take much photos but still it's a long awaiting outing.
Cine --> John Little --> Far East --> Taka

Not much of a shopping experience.. Only at our last destination, we finally found something we like..

Customised Laggage/Bag Tag...

Siew = Piglet
Reina = Dumbo
Emilie = Princess Ariel/Little Mermaid
Crystal = Pooh

Photos of them will be uploaded soon =)

-------------------------------
Next issue:
Schedule for Yr 1 Sem 2..

I'm defaulted in A12, AL16 (Same class as Teddy for tutorials ('.')!!! )
Duno shld I juz stay put due to hassle or try to change to slot in with my A13??

Dilemma....

-------------------------------
Last issue:
CHRISTINA where are you???

When can I meet up with you?

-------------------------------
Went to fetch my parents at the airport yesterday...
dunno if I'm being to Kiasu or sumthing, I reached at 8plus when they are due to arrive at 10plus... GOSH!!!

In the end, I din notice my parents came out liao, I still dumb dumb-ly looking at the conveyer belt, till they call me saying that they are out already. -.-"

I saw Ouyang Zhen Hua too.. Escorted by police and his assistants I guess... The aunties around me are like "Ouyang something Ouyang something leh!!" Duno his name still say until so excited...... Then a DAMN ACT-SMART uncle said damn loudly "Ouyang Zhen FENG la!!! You all duno meh?"

I was like DOTS -.-".. Say wrong still duno, still say so LOUD!!! OMG....

Reasons y I hate Changi Departure..

2008-11-24T12:10:00.002+08:00

Went to Changi Airport to send my sis off to China..

Sudd felt a sense of sorrow...
I seriously hate Departure Halls... Cuz it is a place of separation.. Be it permanant or temporary.. But still it is a moment of separation..

Haix.. Brought back some memories..

Departure Halls = place of sorrow...

UNLUCKY DAY...

2008-11-23T22:45:00.002+08:00

OMG... like wtf can...

I KENA BIRD SHIT!!! BIRD SHIT BIRD SHIT LEH!!!

WTF...
I'm so going to kill that damn bird... (as if I can even recognise it!!!)

DAMN IT!!!

U are great!!!

2008-11-20T10:32:00.002+08:00

The way you are treating me, the way you answer me, will seriously make me miss de caring you..

I believe you are already showing me lotsa of hints that this is over and rrly over, but I guess I'm not gan1 xin1 about it..

I cannot understand why I keep tryin to degrade myself even if my dear frenz told me to get over it...

Is this over-reliance or is this true love??

I'm living all alone now.. I have to learn to let go.. He is gone and will owaes be gone.. dere is not even a single 0.00000000000001 chance he will come back, he already state it straightforwardly..

Reina, get a hold of urself... Stop deceiving yourself!!!
U love him but it's not the case for him... He made it clear!!

2008-11-17T19:48:00.002+08:00

我很想痛哭一场，可是我没办法。

时间不对，地方不对

为何你要这样对我？
为何不早点告诉我事实？

我宁愿你不隐瞒我

我真的很喜欢你
可是现在已经不像以前一样了

你已经不会在乎我的感受，你也不会再管我

我只是希望得到一个机会。
我真的不想放开。
我也放不开。

I'm upset yet I have no say

2008-11-17T14:55:00.002+08:00

Finally gt ur true ans.. ur true reason.. ur true explanation.

I know u stopped liking me quite some time ago, but why did it take you so long to tell me?

I may be heartbroken but there is nothing I can do..

Will you still love u??
In the future not de near future..

Cus i'm still loving you..

2008-11-14T22:23:00.003+08:00

At this point of time..

I'm crying..

But my thoughts are running thru my mind at the same...

Why must I degrade myself to keep on trying to get close to you?

Why can't I juz walk away like you did?

Why can't I accept the change in you?

Why can you leave me just like that?

I tot u say u like me, but it seem to me that you don't..

You dun seem to bother how suffering I am now..

If u tell me all these aft getting a not-satisfactory result, I guess I can accept this better..

But now it seem to me that this is not the reason... There seem to be more hidden meaning to this... Is not that i believe you, is that I cannot believe myself that the person ignoring me now is de person I like de most..

to a OMG guy... DISGUSTING IDIOT

2008-11-14T17:30:00.002+08:00

this post is dedicated to some idiot who think he is so...

smart
good looking
charming
all rounder

puke!!!

stop acting smart and all so charming can...
U have no rights to comment abt me commenting abt others....

Wad r u doing.. you r COMMENTING abt me...
so u have totally no rights to comment me...

So juz shut up and SHOO!!!
gt out of our (me and my fren) sight...

You are in fact

disgusting
GROSS
irritating
act-smart
act-shuai (damn la.. u r even far from "act-shuai")
mouth too much to say..
think too highly of himself...

WTF!!!
JUST DISAPPEAR INTO THIN AIR LA!!!

DUN COMMENT ABOUT MY COURSE
if u think it suck, you beta not get into it... cuz I'll make sure u DIE!!!
pray hard you get into BUSINESS...

why leh???
cuz u will be de loser of BUSINESS and be outcasted!!!
too loser to even fit into BUSINESS la...

*PS pardon my words... just flaring!!!

when I think of you

2008-11-14T11:09:00.002+08:00

For one whole week, I managed to control my tears...

but yesterday, when I was lying in bed, out of a sudd, tears juz flow... I tried controlling them... but it's not possible.. Why??

When I see basketball
I think of u..

When I see red,
I think of u..

Whenever I wear my newbie tee,
I think of u..

Whenever I look at Lumpy,
I think of u..

I wanted to do what the song "Li Kai Wo" sings..
But I cannot bear to do so..

My hp startup screen is still you..
My mp3 player background is also you..

U say before dat u are also tryin to get over, I hope u do so soon..
Cuz it's too suffering to keep stay in it...

2008-11-11T22:56:00.002+08:00

at this very last minute, den I start to get serious...
It's too late to start now...
Might as well give up..

But what's the point of crying over spilled milk... I sld regret... I sld n I will..
I need you to be by me to accompany me to study..

That's de reliance I'm still having...
I seriously need you by my side...
Esp at this moment...

Jiro n Danson

2008-11-11T14:47:00.002+08:00

I'm deeply in love with DANSON TANG YU ZHE!!! --> Xia Yu aka Gui Feng
LOL...

And also JIRO WANG DONG CHENG!!! --> Xia Tian aka Gui Long
OMG!!! OMG!!!

Is jealousy playing a part in missing u?? Do I miss you or do I miss the feeling of having someone there for me???

I rrly do u will be dere for me, but I know it's not possible...
Haiz..
I still tot you could pei me study for my exams..

Sat, I will be all alone... Haiz...

2008-11-08T20:13:00.004+08:00

I seriously wonder what's wrong with me...

I'll keep looking at the Flight status everytime u depart with a smile on my face knowing that u will come back for me de next round and everytime u arrive with a grin cuz i know I'll be able to see u real soon..

but why this time, when I saw ur flight arrived, I actually started crying, crying my heart out... I told myself I have to forget about you but why m I not able to do so...

I tot of staying over for the weekend in hall, so that I can secretly travel to airport to fetch u (secretly).. but I decided to back out cuz I'm afraid I'll juz burst out crying on the spot... I tot of hiding jus to see you.. you dun need to see me, but i rrly hope to see u...

I miss you.. I rrly do... but what's de point of me saying that everything is over... It may seem to you they are words that will be blown away with the wind... But it's impt to me...

U won't even be reading my blog anymore thus this is my only channel to reveal my true feelings, true emotions... I cannot let you see my weak side.. I cannot..

You may see me smiling, but deep inside, lies a broken heart...

I pray hard...

2008-11-08T18:17:00.002+08:00

my eyes keep looking towards the clock, hoping that 9.35 arrives soon..

but at the same time, I hope i could be very selfish, i dun want him to come back!!!

I rrly hope to see you again.. But will I be able to???
tears flow again..

2008-11-08T14:35:00.002+08:00

~<一路顺风>~
praying that it will be a safe journey for u...

I guess that's de most I can do now..

Take care and enjoy ur holidays..
U finally came back.. Ur frenz are all here..
Enjoy it while u can, before a new semester starts..
I believe U can pass de.. Dun worry..

2008-11-08T11:52:00.002+08:00

Today is the day I WOULD (in the past) have been lookin forward to.. But now I rrly hope that he dun come back... I dun like the feeling of not being able to see him while he is nearer now...

I tried to divert my attention to taiwanese drama --> X-Family.. with Danson Tang and Jiro Wang as Xia Yu and Xia Tian (brothers) respectively in the show..

but the moment I lie on my bed, my tears jus flow down..

The feeling is still lingering in me.. and it is taking effect again..

i rrly wish u could talk 2 me...

2008-11-06T20:00:00.002+08:00

U make your stand very clearly..
I heard it very clearly..

But how I wish you would talk to me..
How i wish I could feel secured once again..

I know all these is now only my wishful thinking,
it will never happen now and in the near future..

Bye Bye happiness, say Hi to loneliness!!!

I wish for a chance...

My current addiction…

My truly first CLUBBING experience...

Tear of remorse and guilt

what's the point??

prepared to die

Farewell to hall life…

Count down to the totally stressless exam of my life...

F**KING stupid~~~

Exams

Time flies rrly fast...

April Fool's

betrayal

do I still love him?

To Christina

About my birthday... although still a long way...

Triumph Sale~~

Show some consideration pls

A chance to go back to Abbort

I miss all of you

my loveD for him

Crying is all i can get from talking to u..

Lookin back into my life..

Sore and sour

Damn Facebook

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

utter shock...

MY EYECANDY~~~

Hey there, MR Gorgeous~~~

Absolute Boyfriend

Dead or alive?

蔡依林 - 离人节

Jokes have a little truth in it

Regrets

1 person @ 3 places..

my definition of hall

Hidden Meaning of my name

left ambiguous

I found out he unblock me...

Christina's 20th Birthday.

My new love

Singapore Flyer..

Teddy zeng

Chingay Day 2

半情歌

Chingay 2009 Day 1

你的承诺 - 海鸣威 泳儿

My CNY without you

I am a tulip

Genie Zhuo Wen Xuan

All confused

Wanyan, xueting and wei wren..

Jealousy??

Woke up with a bad sore..

Sick

All by myself...

in front of u

Utter disappointment in you

Deep inside my heart

Recent Photos

Personal message to all

My official Resolution for 2009

A brand new year - 2009

Welcome to Rumpy..

Assumption kills

His appeal letter..

back from malacca...

me n me alone..

He called me...

Occupy my mind...

My boring Holiday...

Reasons y I hate Changi Departure..

UNLUCKY DAY...

U are great!!!

I'm upset yet I have no say

to a OMG guy... DISGUSTING IDIOT

when I think of you

Jiro n Danson

I pray hard...

i rrly wish u could talk 2 me...

你的承诺 - 海鸣威泳儿